Hair removal

[Creature]

Ok, so these summer threads got me thinking. I’m not a super hairy dude, but I have some chest/stomach hair, which I’m good with. But then, I have some hair around my shoulders and a little on my lower back. It’s not thick but I guess for summer I could try to get rid of it. What are my options? Shave? Wax? Chemical remover?

[LesserBlackDog]

I have a similar problem. I'm pretty hairy and I actually like most of my body hair - except for what's on my upper arms, shoulders, and back. It's not carpet-like or anything but it's still longer, darker, and patchy in a way I do not like.

For a long time I shaved my back and shoulders but that's a PITA, results in next-day back stubble (ew), causes ingrown hairs/exacerbates backne, etc., and has to be constantly maintained. Plus it's just hard to do yourself and you tend to miss spots. One summer a couple years ago I got waxed, but even after exfoliating properly before and after getting waxed, that also caused ingrown hairs, exacerbated backne, and honestly only lasted 2-3 weeks. The results just didn't seem worth the money or effort. Like, it was fine while it lasted, but I'm not going to spend an hour and $60-80 every 2-3 weeks for that. For a while after that I would shave with a Phillips OneBlade, which was easier than shaving with a razor and didn't cause as many skin problems, but also left me with constant unpleasant-feeling back stubble.

For the past 6-9 months I've just left it alone and honestly, while I don't love it, it's not that bad. I find that most grown-ass straight women (and gay men) are actually not grossed out by male body hair the way we are conditioned to expect. It also helps that I've bulked up considerably so my body hair isn't quite so mismatched to my formerly skinny, twinky build.

Maybe one day I will work up the gumption to get it lasered off if I still care. For now I'm just kind of letting it be what it is and trying not to worry about it too much.

In your shoes, if it's mostly just for the summer I might consider getting it waxed since you wouldn't have to do it more than two or three times to get you through the season. Just don't plan on getting it waxed right before you go off on a long beach weekend or something, because most people's skin will react to the waxing process (it will look very red and may feel itchy as though you're having an allergic reaction) and it can take a few days to settle down.

[Creature]

For the past 6-9 months I've just left it alone and honestly, while I don't love it, it's not that bad. I find that most grown-ass straight women (and gay men) are actually not grossed out by male body hair the way we are conditioned to expect. It also helps that I've bulked up considerably so my body hair isn't quite so mismatched to my formerly skinny, twinky build.

Sounds like you have a similar situation to mine. The approach I quoted is the approach I’ve taken to date. I have an athletic build so maybe that helps. I might try the wax, we’ll see if any other options come up.

[DocDave]

I do not have this issue. So I really have no idea what I'm talking about then But in reading this thread my intimidate response was to say wax. I only say this because in speaking with various women/partners over the course of my life, they have preferred waxing for hair removal.

That said, I have also been told that waxing HURTS! So good on ya if you go for it and are able to handle it.

[JBarwick]

I will chime in as it sounds like I am hairier than the rest of you. My wife preferred letting it grow out than trimming it due to some of the problems LBD mentioned but also she said I look like a kid clean shaven.. The hairiness bothered me for the first year or so but now I just live with it. I am a runner and prefer shirtless in the summer. While bothering the first couple of times, I have mostly forgotten about it.

I think it is more personal preference than anything. People seem accepting of your decision so you do you man.

For reference, I have shaved, waxed, and nair'd none of which are easy or last a long time.

[LesserBlackDog]

I feel like it would help to have more positive cultural images of dudes with normal hairy backs. Like 100% no joke, the thing that tipped me over to stop stressing over my back hair was playing Red Dead Redemption 2 and seeing Arthur Morgan’s hairy back when he’s getting out of the bathtub. “If this badass mofo can have a hairy back in a giant blockbuster video game I can probably have one in my boring real life.” Also, seeing Mathew Fraser in the CrossFit games (back when I was into that) helped to start reshaping my thinking on the issue.

When you think about it it’s actually super twisted that there is so much positivity about almost all male body hair EXCEPT on the back, where you almost NEVER see it in any kind of mainstream imagery. It’s treated sort of like women’s armpit hair by mainstream culture - no one talks about it and there seems to be a silent pact to pretend it doesn’t even exist.

[DunkanWS]

Use wax only in that situation if you 100 % sure, that you will handle it, hah

[C.Dubs]

I'm no incredibly hairy, but I'm in my thirties and am now growing hair in places where I didn't used to grow hair. The places that bother me are my shoulders and my upper arms. I'm looking into laser hair removal which is a lot more affordable than I expected. I can get my shoulders, arms, and neck/collarbone all done for less $1,000. I feel like that's not a bad price to never have to worry about weird old-man hair popping up around my collar.

A few years ago I waxed. Didn't like it. Like LBD said, waxing lead to ingrown hairs, acne, irritated skin, and didn't last long.

[hockeysc23]

So no first hand experience but my aunt had her arms lasered and it eventually grew back thicker and corser she would tell my mom. So it may have changed but not forever for her. That’s scared me away from the thought.

I’m not super hairy but I hate it. It causes me to be hotter and I’m not a fan of the look. I shave my shoulders and upper arms. I started trimming my forearm hair after I had wrist surgery so it didn’t look so different around where they shaved it down for the stitches.

Usually chest, legs and back is trim with an electric razor. Shoulders and arms is razor. There is a folding electric razor for the back that helps hit long patches. I don’t go nuts but ensure no random long hair groupings.

[Shade]

I havent tried this out yet, but I've heard people have had good results. There are some ytube vids of it as well.

https://bakblade.com/