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Officiating a wedding: what to wear?

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    Officiating a wedding: what to wear?



    I'm officiating a friend's secular wedding this next weekend (that is, I'm not clergy and this isn't a religious ceremony). I'm from a religious tradition in which clergy are robed, so I'm trying to figure out what to wear myself, and I don't remember much about the officiants at other wedding I've attended. The wedding will be outside, and the wedding invitation says "semiformal attire." The couple didn't have much to say when I asked about my dress -- they ended up saying "a suit." I'm thinking about this suit that I wore to church today (the dark grey Thompson suit) but the red tie might be odd. I have a black and a navy blue tie that may be better. I was thinking about staying away from bright or patterned ties, because it draws attention away from the couple. Also, black shoes would be better than dark brown, right? I realize this doesn't matter much and hardly anyone will care, but I want to do my part to make the wedding as nice as possible.


    So, any advice?





    #2


    You may not be a cleric, but you should dress similar to one - sober and simple. I think you're right to question the red tie. With a charcoal suit, I'd probably pick the navy tie, a white shirt, and black shoes/belt.

    Ben

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      #3


      The strict definition of "semi-formal" still dictates a suit and tie. Plenty of people will probably misread that and show up in their khakis. While this much is personal opinion, I would expect the officiant the most dressed-up person there.


      The suit above is a great choice. I concur on choosing a different tie, though. Also try to avoid any of the bride's colors if you know them. Pocket squares or any other flourishes should probably be avoided, too. The shirt should obviously be white.


      If you have a solid grey tie, this might be a good time to wear it.

      Comment


        #4


        I took too long to write, and BenR beat me by 51 seconds. :-P

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          #5


          I did it just to annoy you, Alan. :-)

          Ben

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            #6


            Thanks BenR and Alan -- I appreciate the feedback. Grey or navy tie and black shoes it is, then. I feel a lot better after this!

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              #7


              Speaking of wedding officiating, this is a great bit, but it would only work in very specific contexts:


              http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OVz2X...e_gdata_player

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                #8


                Concur with BenR, I think you're making a good call with tie change. Look good, neutral, and attract zero attention to yourself. It's all about the bride and groom.

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                  #9


                  Curiously enough, I officiated two friends' secular wedding three weeks ago, and the circumstances were largely similar to yours, BB.

                  Discretion seemed appropriate, so I wore a slim grey DKNY suit, white poplin shirt, black satin tie and a pair of black AE Park Aves. Added a white silk pocket square at the last minute.


                  It took much more effort to write the ceremony than to decide what to wear!

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                    #10


                    Thanks all.


                    Robert12, I know exactly what you're saying. Just finished with the ceremony, which is why I'm only thinking about my clothes a few days out.

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