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    #16
    Yeah, I'd suggest talking to the couple, and also possibly some mutual friends who will be going to see what their attire will be.

    I mean, a tux on the beach seems like the sort of thing I'd imagine in a Bond film for the morning after, with bow tie undone, rather than done full up.

    Also, confirming that the wedding is actually ON the beach and not simply AT the beach?

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      #17
      Originally posted by aps2012 View Post
      I get the heat issue, but this applies to summer weddings just about anywhere in the US.
      Yes, but tuxedos are almost exclusively made in all-season material, etc, with a jacket lining, whereas summer suits can be much cooler.

      And with a summer suit you don't have the addition of an extra layer (cummerbund) around the waist. And sometimes a summer suit can look very good without a tie.

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        #18
        Originally posted by JT10000 View Post
        Yes, but tuxedos are almost exclusively made in all-season material, etc, with a jacket lining, whereas summer suits can be much cooler.

        And with a summer suit you don't have the addition of an extra layer (cummerbund) around the waist. And sometimes a summer suit can look very good without a tie.
        Funny thing is that the cummerbund was introduced as a warm-weather alternative to the waistcoat, derived from the sashes worn in India. Though nowadays the backless vest introduced by the Duke of Windsor in the 1920s would probably be cooler to wear.

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          #19
          Thanks for all the good responses! This is continuing to be very helpful. I know the best answer is to ask, which I'll likely wind up doing, but wanted to wrap my head around ideas before. Currently I'm batting around the idea of my white dinner jacket, black tux pants, but doing a blue bow tie of some sort along with my blue suede loafers. Likely ditching cummerbund as well. It'd be a fairly creative black tie, with a beach/tropical twist, and straying far from traditional, but could be nice if I find the right bowtie.

          Originally posted by LesserBlackDog View Post
          Unfriend these plebes, go to Mexico anyway, profit.
          LOL - I like this option, but the wife may not be a fan (it's her friend's wedding).

          Originally posted by Galcobar View Post
          I know it's a rather extreme option in current society, but perhaps try contacting the happy couple? As others have said they may not realize how contradictory the message is, and would appreciate the suggestion to clarify the matter, for all their invitees. If sartorially well-educated people such as we are confused, imagine how the average person is feeling.

          As for black-tie traditions in hot weather, consider the Red Sea Rig. It comes from the Royal Navy, which in turn had taken a cue from India. Ditch the jacket for a red or maroon cummerbund over a pleated/Marcella shirt with a matching bow tie, and black or midnight blue tuxedo trousers. The Red Sea Rig spread from the military to be current appropriate formalwear for British and American diplomats in hot regions, primarily for locations which lack air conditioning. Navy and commercial cruise line officers usually wear a short-sleeve version.
          Well I learned something new today -- not sure I can pull that off, but cool history.

          Originally posted by JT10000 View Post
          Yes, but tuxedos are almost exclusively made in all-season material, etc, with a jacket lining, whereas summer suits can be much cooler.

          And with a summer suit you don't have the addition of an extra layer (cummerbund) around the waist. And sometimes a summer suit can look very good without a tie.
          All of this is why I'm confused/frustrated at not knowing how to approach. My dinner jacket is a cotton/linen blend (and even my traditional black tux is a summer/cool weight), which is helpful, but both still lined for obvious reasons.

          Originally posted by Galcobar View Post
          Funny thing is that the cummerbund was introduced as a warm-weather alternative to the waistcoat, derived from the sashes worn in India. Though nowadays the backless vest introduced by the Duke of Windsor in the 1920s would probably be cooler to wear.
          I'm a never vest type. Normally I'm always cummerbund, but depending on what I do here I may skip it for this one.

          Comment


            #20
            Originally posted by aps2012 View Post
            I'm going to take a contrary position: anything that requires being anything other than barefoot, or *maybe* flip flops on an actual sand beach is "too formal." So once you're requiring shoes of any sort, the top, why not have it be formal? And I don't see how sand is going to be any more a problem for a tux than for any other clothes.

            I get the heat issue, but this applies to summer weddings just about anywhere in the US.

            And I get wanting to be married right by the ocean. Sounds amazing.
            Seconded, not sure what is confusing. Wear a tux if you want, if not wear a suit.

            Let this be your guide:https://www.thevintagenews.com/wp-co...7/9evkapda.jpg

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              #21
              What an interesting contradiction!

              First, I'd confirm the wedding is actually on the beach versus a beachfront property. For a beachfront property, your recommended combo sounds spot on.

              If you're actually on the beach in Mexico, having anything more than a linen shirt and some lightweight, rolled up dress pants seems like overkill.

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                #22
                Had my SO ask, and the ceremony is indeed on the beach, not just beachfront property. Bride somewhat acknowledged that it doesn't make sense, but didn't otherwise get too much guidance.

                I do think the "what is the issue?!" crowd is seeing this a bit more simple than most. There is an inherent disconnect between normal beach wedding attire and a stated "black tie optional" dress code. If you do not wear a tux for BTO, the appropriate alternative is a dark suit and tie. Heck, but for a tropical locale, technically BTO should mean black bow tie / black tux (or midnight navy), not a white or other dinner jacket. That being said, some disregard dress code norms, which is fine--just not my SOP.

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                  #23
                  Tux on the beach is just blowing my tiny mind.

                  Like all I can imagine people wearing at beach destination weddings is flowy off-white linen. Probably barefoot. With bad sunglasses. At the ceremony.

                  IDK.
                  Ben

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                    #24
                    Lean into the beach part, and get yourself a pair of patent leather (cause it's a tux) Vibram Five Finger "shoes."

                    Comment


                      #25
                      Shoot, I'd go a step further and wear a white linen, or seersucker, shirt underneath. There are going to be two groups of people there: those that dress up for it and are uncomfortable, and those that dress for the weather. I'd try to land in the middle while still looking good if you end up in any photographs. No one will care about in-person wrinkles, and the camera won't immortalize those kinds of details anyway.

                      Also, what time of day is this?

                      I've done a bit of fancy wedding videography in southern california, not as tropical as mexico, but you do get ocean breeze. So dressing up but letting air in helps. Leave your sleeves unbottoned.

                      Comment


                        #26
                        Originally posted by Domino View Post
                        Lean into the beach part, and get yourself a pair of patent leather (cause it's a tux) Vibram Five Finger "shoes."
                        I love the last part. I actually have several pairs of 5 fingers and used to wear them all the time (not just for running) when I used to run a lot. Super comfortable for my wide, flat feet. Now I only wear them when I'm working out, running, or hiking.

                        If only regular shoes could be feet shaped and still look good.

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                          #27
                          I have gone to a black tie optional beach wedding. It was awfully stupid.

                          The ceremony was also on the beach itself, and then the reception was indoors, just a few yards away at the resort's reception hall. I assume this was offered as part of some destination wedding package, similar to what you'll be doing.

                          I actually asked the groom about it, and he said that they made it "black tie optional" to deter the guests from wearing hawaiian shirts and flip flops at the wedding. They didn't want the wedding photos to look like the guests were at a summer BBQ. Might be the same rationale that the bridge and groom at your upcoming wedding are thinking.

                          Ultimately, almost everyone wore full suits (albeit in lighter colors, like heather grays, medium/royal blues, etc.), and only the immediate family members and wedding party opted for tuxes. I did the same (wearing a suit), and it looked fine.

                          I am the kind of guy that will 99% of the time wear a tux if it's "black tie optional" (I bought one, so why not?), but I couldn't bring myself to wear a tux on the beach. It seemed stupid, and I thought it would be way too hot to wear one. Also, given the age range of most of the guests at this wedding (late 20s to early 30s), I thought that only half of the guests would wear a tux at any black tie optional wedding, and probably a fraction of that half would wear a tux given the weather.

                          All in all, I think I made the right choice with what I wore (a lighter colored wool suit), and I, like you, spent way too much time thinking about it.

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                            #28
                            I envision myself spending the entire ceremony looking around at other guests furious they are underdressed and more comfortable than me, then drinking too much at the open bar to compensate.

                            Comment


                              #29
                              Originally posted by lax101 View Post
                              I have gone to a black tie optional beach wedding. It was awfully stupid.

                              The ceremony was also on the beach itself, and then the reception was indoors, just a few yards away at the resort's reception hall. I assume this was offered as part of some destination wedding package, similar to what you'll be doing.

                              I actually asked the groom about it, and he said that they made it "black tie optional" to deter the guests from wearing hawaiian shirts and flip flops at the wedding. They didn't want the wedding photos to look like the guests were at a summer BBQ. Might be the same rationale that the bridge and groom at your upcoming wedding are thinking.

                              Ultimately, almost everyone wore full suits (albeit in lighter colors, like heather grays, medium/royal blues, etc.), and only the immediate family members and wedding party opted for tuxes. I did the same (wearing a suit), and it looked fine.

                              I am the kind of guy that will 99% of the time wear a tux if it's "black tie optional" (I bought one, so why not?), but I couldn't bring myself to wear a tux on the beach. It seemed stupid, and I thought it would be way too hot to wear one. Also, given the age range of most of the guests at this wedding (late 20s to early 30s), I thought that only half of the guests would wear a tux at any black tie optional wedding, and probably a fraction of that half would wear a tux given the weather.

                              All in all, I think I made the right choice with what I wore (a lighter colored wool suit), and I, like you, spent way too much time thinking about it.
                              Thanks for the input. It's still an interesting one to me, as the bride/groom are from good families, from tri-state area, def know black tie, etc., so it isn't a situation where they don't know what they're asking. In fact, the response my wife got was that they understood it. It is their wedding, so I am wanting to honor their wishes for attire appropriately. Just trying to figure out how best to do it! (and not die of heartstroke / still look dapper without being overly dandy)

                              Originally posted by Kurps View Post
                              I envision myself spending the entire ceremony looking around at other guests furious they are underdressed and more comfortable than me, then drinking too much at the open bar to compensate.
                              This is most certainly what will occur, so long as you mix in a bit of contempt and self-aggrandizement.

                              Comment


                                #30
                                Originally posted by hornsup84 View Post
                                Thanks for the input. It's still an interesting one to me, as the bride/groom are from good families, from tri-state area, def know black tie, etc., so it isn't a situation where they don't know what they're asking. In fact, the response my wife got was that they understood it. It is their wedding, so I am wanting to honor their wishes for attire appropriately. Just trying to figure out how best to do it! (and not die of heartstroke / still look dapper without being overly dandy)



                                This is most certainly what will occur, so long as you mix in a bit of contempt and self-aggrandizement.
                                What about that grey Bonobos tux on the dappered front page deals post?

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