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Shoes to bury people in

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    Shoes to bury people in

    I attended my first funeral in several years, and dusting off my square-toed black derbys was not my favorite thing in the world. I need a new pair of black shoes that are funeral appropriate. It seems like a nice oxford would be the way to go (vs. a derby) but as I don't get a lot of mileage out of black shoes (mostly cognac or burgundy), I'd probably never wear them asides from...well..funerals.

    Is there any shoe that "toes the line" between being formal/appropriate enough for a funeral, but also able to wear without a suit? Like a double monk or a chelsea boot? Either of those I could see wearing on another occasion, but a black, laceup oxford...just isn't going to get a lot of mileage (which is fine if that's what it has to be).

    #2
    Originally posted by sandwich View Post
    I attended my first funeral in several years, and dusting off my square-toed black derbys was not my favorite thing in the world. I need a new pair of black shoes that are funeral appropriate. It seems like a nice oxford would be the way to go (vs. a derby) but as I don't get a lot of mileage out of black shoes (mostly cognac or burgundy), I'd probably never wear them asides from...well..funerals.

    Is there any shoe that "toes the line" between being formal/appropriate enough for a funeral, but also able to wear without a suit? Like a double monk or a chelsea boot? Either of those I could see wearing on another occasion, but a black, laceup oxford...just isn't going to get a lot of mileage (which is fine if that's what it has to be).
    Is a black balmoral wingtip too close to what you're trying to avoid? I wear mine with suits and charcoal odd trousers.

    Edited to add: sorry for your loss.
    “There are moments, Jeeves, when one asks oneself, 'Do trousers matter?'"
    "The mood will pass, sir.”

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      #3
      No one is looking at your shoes at a funeral, so if they're black, you're probably fine. That being said, conceptually, I feel like a double monk would kind of go against the idea of dressing demurely in a certain way. I doubt anyone would blink at a chelsea boot (particularly since the stretchy part would be black as well as opposed to contrasting with other color leather).

      That being said, do you ever need black shoes for formal attire events? I use my own black captoes (shined up) for that as well. Something to think about if you're buying your only black shoe.

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        #4
        Unless it's a very formal funeral, I doubt anyone would notice what you are wearing. I attended a funeral for the first time as an adult last year and made sure to follow all the rules (black suit, somber tie, plain black shoes, etc). Half the people at the funeral were just in what I would consider business casual and very few of those who did wear a jacket or a suit wore black. It's really all about the person you are remembering and their family though, and nobody is really looking at clothes.

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          #5
          Shoes to bury people in

          Weirdest thread title ever. Don't overthink it. Black and conservative. No one will notice anyways.

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            #6
            What about a single monk like the AE Warwick http://www.allenedmonds.com/shoes/me...ps/SF5750.html
            Black Chelsea boot mentioned above is also a good idea. To parrot what was said above; nobody is looking at your shoes, as long as it isn't too gaudy, you should be fine.

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              #7
              Originally posted by Brent k View Post
              Weirdest thread title ever.
              I was going into the thread thinking people were going to talk about what shoes will be buried into the ground.

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                #8
                Originally posted by ninpb View Post
                I was going into the thread thinking people were going to talk about what shoes will be buried into the ground.
                Lol, me too

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                  #9
                  Originally posted by ninpb View Post
                  I was going into the thread thinking people were going to talk about what shoes will be buried into the ground.
                  Exactly what I was thinking.

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                    #10
                    Those would have to be some really big shoes.

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                      #11
                      Seriously, just don't worry about it. Wear whatever you have if the need arises. Genuine mourning obviates the need for fashionable mourning every time.

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                        #12
                        MY black funeral shoes are also my interview shoes. AE Park Avenue's


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                          #13
                          Originally posted by ianmichaelray View Post
                          Those would have to be some really big shoes.
                          i may break the entire internet with this one...


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                            #14
                            I think there is hardly any place on the planet where fashion matters less than a funeral. Black or charcoal everything and a white shirt. You can wear square toed shoes and an old 1980's Brooks Brothers black suit that fits like a potato sack and be dressed perfectly in my opinion.

                            A wedding is a party where we can celebrate and wear celebratory clothes, but a funeral is about supporting someone else. Obviously, this is just my $0.02.

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                              #15
                              Thanks guys. It's not about worrying how good I look at the funeral- it's about buying a pair of shoes that will be ready for me so I don't have to think at the time (and maybe get use out of now). At my grandmother's funeral (she was 90, it was her time, but thank you for the kind thoughts), there were people in brown suits, ski jackets, and everything else. I know there won't be anybody looking at my shoes at this or any future funeral, but I'd rather put the thought in now so I don't have to later. If I can get a little wear out of the shoes elsewhere, I'd be much happier than dropping money on a pair of shoes that I wouldn't take out of the closet for anything else, like my square toes....so that's why I'm asking.

                              I have a navy and light grey suit, the navy suit with a white shirt and black tie/leather/shoes is what I would wear in the future. I don't want to be flashy, like I said, but if I can double these shoes for interviews or weddings but dress them more conservatively for an occasional funeral, I'll be happy.

                              Thanks for the help.

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